Something funny!

Most people hope for presents from Santa every year. Santa hopes for presents from Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can win a game of UNO without throwing away his cards.
Chuck Norris once stared at the sun for hours… the sun then blinked.

So I was researching funny poems for my mom-She teaches Grade Three-and I found some that I thought were funny.

I've added images of three poems that I wrote when I was Nine-Yes, Nine-and all three of them were published in the National Newspaper in East Timor.. in 2001.
East Timor, for those of you who don't know, is a tiny country off the coast of Australia, which fought for its independence from Indonesia.

Lovely Teacher by Linda Knaus

Lovely teacher, lovely teacher
eyes of periwinkle blue.
You are such a pretty creature,
and I’m so in love with you.
How I long for your attention,
so I’m acting like a fool.
Put me down for some detention,
just don’t send me home from school.
Oh, I’m filled with pain and sorrow,
for my teacher is so cute,
but she won’t be here tomorrow,
’cause she’s just a substitute


Food Fight by Kenn Nesbitt

We’d never seen the teachers
in a state of such distress.
The principal was yelling
that the lunchroom was a mess.
It started off so innocent
when someone threw a bun,
but all the other kids decided
they should join the fun.

It instantly turned into
an enormous lunchroom feud,
as students started hurling
all their halfway-eaten food.

A glob went whizzing through the air,
impacting on the wall.
Another chunk went sailing out
the doorway to the hall.

The food was splattered everywhere—
the ceilings, walls, and doors.
A sloppy, gloppy mess was on
the tables and the floors.

And so our good custodian
ran out to grab his mop.
It took him half the afternoon
to clean up all the slop.

The teachers even used some words
we’re not supposed to mention.
And that’s how all the kids and teachers
wound up in detention.

I'll leave you with a sad picture today. It's of me.. When I was One-and-a-half. I went into the kitchen, and my mom was cooking. She had just taken the frying pan off the stove-and it was filled with oil-and I ran into her.. and the burning oil fell on my face.
Those are burns, yes. I used to think that it was ketchup on my face until my mom told me.. And it's an awesome picture of me. I really don't know why I love the picture.

In my next post, expect many funny pictures. MANY.

Oh, andddd. The One Who Leaves Me Breathless. I really wanted to write your name here, but you asked me not to.
You are amazing. You may not think that you are, but you really are awesome.
Everyone usually runs away from me when I have a migraine. But you, you stick with me and you make sure that it goes away, even when you have a big test that you need to study for the next day.
I love youuuuu.