365 Day Project, Day 12

I wrote that for myself two hours after it started snowing. And yes, it is my birthday today.

Blogoversary!

A year ago, I was in America, preparing to leave for Pakistan.
I was looking forward to seeing my homeland again as well as all my friends and The One Who Leaves Me Breathless.
And I was anxiously waiting for Harvard University to tell me if they would give me admission or not.
A year later, I'm in Pakistan, preparing to leave for America.
I'm looking forward to healing.
I haven't given up. I'm just hurting too much.
And I'm waiting for Rowan University to reply to my application.
It's a journey of 326 miles from Harvard to Rowan. I've come a long way.


It's my Blogoversary. That means that it's been a year since I started my blog. And to celebrate it-it's 2:26 a.m. and I just woke up after dreaming of taking pictures with a professional camera with The One Who Leaves Me Breathless and unbelievably, my head hurts worse than it has all three days of my migraine but I still feel like celebrating having survived for so long-I have two guest posts from two amazing people.
It's like a birthday when you get texts & Facebook notifications saying 'Happy Blogoversary!'


The first is from Mahnoor (a.k.a. The Butterfly Effect).
I'm honored to write something for my favorite follower :)

I don't personally know you. I mean I do but I dunno. I mean your blog is all personal so I do know you personally. We've chatted a couple of times but that's it. Even though communication between us has been minimal I feel as though i see myself in you when i was 19. You're at the height of emotions. I've been there. and I know how it feels. It's like there's just too much of feeling inside us but we've got no one to share it with, or at least no one who captures its intensity.

When i read about Aral and Ayza and about the one who leaves you breathless it makes me feel happy for you but it also makes me feel sad. Because reading from what you write it seems as though what you're giving isn't being returned to you not even close to the level it should be.

Recently, once again i discovered that the cure to the soul lies only and only in the remembrance of our Creator. And kiddo, believe it or not, your soul is hurting. I see it in all your posts. the damage that is being done isn't just to your heart or your brain or just your body. It goes way beyond. I've been through a situation where my soul hurt so bad and i wished that I had someone who could have told me to hold myself together. But there wasn't. And maybe I sound like a busy body to you but honestly, I am being sincere.

You know God has made humans such that we crave for love. And no matter how much we deny it we fall in love over and over and over again. Yes, "the one" love happens only once but it doesn't mean that the rest of it is any less beautiful.
think about it.

and oh, BTW, happy Blogoversary :D

Something for your followers:
Guys, he's an amazing kid. Got a heart of liquid gold. and I hope its also true about his brains ;)
If I were a few years younger and of course unmarried, he would have long been past the one who leaves him breathless :P

I can't believe I'm hitting on a kid :P Jokes aside, he's a great kid. and from what I've read a great son too. 
keep blogging kiddo and have a happy and purposeful life.



And the second is from Areesha at Me, Myself, and I.

When I first started my blog 'Me, Myself and I' (terrible name, I know), I did not expect to have many followers which was true for the first 2 or 3 months. Then an amazing person called Ovais (a.k.a Cheeku )became my follower and BOOM! I became a part of the Blogger family; something I never thought would be possible.

After he added me on Facebook and we exchanged numbers, we became like the best of friends. Which involves me telling him about the craziness that is my life and the two of us helping the other during those despicable bouts of depression that we're prone to.

Cheeku, you're the best friend I have, the sweetest, kindest, most generous and the weirdest person I know (second to Zeezu in craziness of course). I know you're always there for me and you know I'm always here for you. I'll never regret the day you came into my life. Love you, mate =)

P.S. Come to Rawalpindi already so that I can take you to Gloria Jeans =P

P.P.S. This is the suckiest guest post I've written and I'm gonna write a proper post for you once I'm free. 

Will you be my chamack chalo?

Hii.


I am happy. Yes, very happy. Even though I miss The One Who Leaves Me Breathless like a lot.


Compare that to how I was yesterday. It was like how the rest of the year had been.


I woke up sad, my friend's dad had passed away, and so I spent time with him. His mum had passed away in January, so he really needed someone to keep checking on him.


But yeah, I went to my great-grandmother's house after that. And I got my camera. Which I had waited a long time for!

My present from mum.

don't say a word
just come over and lie here with me
cause I'm just about to set fire to everything I see


And I just love my camera. It is amazing. And I can finally take awesomer pictures! I've been taking pictures since sixth grade. Using an ancient Fuji camera and my cellphone camera.

This is a picture of a model of the Great Wall that one of my teachers got me.

See how amazing my pictures turn out to be?
Where was I? Oh, yeah. How yesterday was.


My last day of being Eighteen was.. okay. Did I already say that?
Anyway.


I played cricket. Something I haven't done in years. Like a proper game with my brothers. Since I love soccer.
And I listened to music for most of the day.


Girl you are my chammak challo.
Where you go girl, I'm gonna follow.
What you want girl just let me know.
You can be my chammak challo.


My baby cousin was dancing to Chammak Challo and that reminded me of Aral and Ayza. Aral and Ayza are, by the way, the two babies that I dream about and will, with God's will and blessing, see one day.
Which reminds me, I was missing The One Who Leaves Me Breathless so much that I actually forgot I was turning nineteen soon.

And today?
Today was.. new. different. a new experience. But then it's the new experiences that make life worthwhile, don't they?


I thought that my beloved was asleep, since she had a very exhausting day. She surprised me, and really made my day.

I was praying at that time-for her, yes-and it's something I do on every birthday when the clock strikes twelve. I pray. There is no better way to start the new year, is there?


I slept quite a bit. And texted a lot. And ordered Dunkin, since my friends forgot it was my birthday and told me they couldn't come to hang out at Dunkin Donuts.

And above all, I took pictures with my new camera. It's the best feeling ever. The third best feeling after being loved and knowing that there is a God above.

Forgiven. :)

Therefore, so far, my nineteenth birthday has gone.. okayish.
The One Who Leaves Me Breathless, I love you and miss you soo much.


I really hope that this is as random as my posts used to be.